Sensitive

“This important book reframes the way we think about sensitivity--our own or someone else’s--and shines a light on the great power in being highly attuned to the world.”--Susan Cain, #1 A paradigm-shifting look at a long-undervalued yet hugely beneficial personality trait, from the creators of the world’s largest community for highly sensitive people Everyone has a sensitive side, but nearly 1 in 3 people have the genes to be more sensitive than others--both physically and emotionally. These are the people who pause before speaking and think before acting; they tune into subtle details and make connections that others miss. They tend to be intelligent, big-hearted, and wonderfully creative; they are wired to go deep, yet society tells them to hide the very sensitivity that makes them this way. These are the world’s “highly sensitive people,” and By the creators of the world’s largest community for sensitive people, A powerfully validating, destigmatizing, and practical book, <Sensitive< plants a gently fluttering flag in the ground for sensitive people everywhere. This inspiring book has the power to change--once and for all--how we see sensitive people, and how they see themselves....

Autorentext

Jenn Granneman and Andre Sólo are the force behind the world’s largest online communities for sensitive people and introverts, Sensitive Refuge and Introvert, Dear. Granneman is also the author of The Secret Lives of Introverts, and has been featured in HuffPost, The Washington Post, the BBC, Oprah Daily, BuzzFeed, Glamour, and more. Sólo has been featured in HuffPost, The Washington Post, Vogue, MSNBC, The Telegraph, and numerous podcasts. Both are regular contributors to Psychology Today and Forbes.

Klappentext

“This&#160;important book reframes the way we think about sensitivity—our own or someone else’s—and shines a light on the great power in being highly attuned to the world.”—Susan Cain, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Bittersweet and Quiet

A paradigm-shifting look at a long-undervalued yet hugely beneficial personality trait, from the creators of the world’s largest community for highly sensitive people
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*“Don’t be so sensitive!”

• Everyone has a sensitive side, but nearly one in three people have the genes to be more sensitive than others—both physically and emotionally. These are the people who pause before speaking and think before acting; they tune in to subtle details and make connections that others miss. Whether introverted or extroverted, they tend to be bighearted, creative, and wired to go deep, yet society tells them to hide the very sensitivity that makes them this way. These are the world’s “highly sensitive people,” and Sensitive is the book that champions them.

From the creators of the world’s largest community for sensitive people, Sensitive teaches us how to unlock the potential in this undervalued strength and leverage it across the most important areas of our lives: friendships and intimate relationships, the workplace, leadership, and parenting. Through fascinating research and expert storytelling, Jenn Granneman and Andre Sólo—sensitive people themselves—show us that the way to thrive as a sensitive person is not to hide our sensitivity but to embrace it, and how to do that in every area of life. Weaving together actionable advice, relatable anecdotes, and the latest scientific research, Granneman and Sólo demonstrate how leaning into sensitivity unlocks a powerful boost effect to propel us ahead in life. They hand us the tools and insights we need to thrive as sensitive people in a loud, fast, too-much world.

A powerfully validating, destigmatizing, and practical book, Sensitive plants a gently fluttering flag in the ground for sensitive people everywhere. This inspiring book has the power to change, once and for all, how we see sensitive people—and how they see themselves.

Leseprobe
**chapter 1

Sensitivity: Stigma or Superpower?

I can’t stand chaos. I hate loud environments. Art makes me cry. No, I’m not crazy; I’m a textbook example of a highly sensitive person. —­Anne Marie Crosthwaite

The year was 1903. Picasso danced at the Moulin Rouge, electric lights burned at all-­night clubs, and Europe’s cities thundered into a new era. Streetcars rushed commuters down buggy-­packed streets, telegraphs connected faraway places, and breaking news crossed continents in minutes. Technology charmed its way into people’s homes, too, with phonographs squawking out music on demand for parties. The songs may have been a prelude to an evening at the picture house—­or they may have covered up the sound of streets being ripped up to install modern sewers. Even the countryside was abuzz, with farmers using mechanized equipment for the first time. Life was changing, and progress, it was believed, was good.

The German city of Dresden wasn’t about to be left behind. Its leaders wanted to show off their own steps forward and crib achievements from other cities. Votes were held, committees were formed, and a citywide expo was announced, complete with a series of public lectures. One of the speakers was the early sociologist Georg Simmel. Although little known today, Simmel was influential in his time. He was one of the first people to apply a scientific approach to human interaction, and his work tackled every part of modern life, from the role of money in human happiness to why people flirt. If city officials hoped he would praise progress, however, they were badly mistaken. Simmel took the podium and promptly threw out the topic he’d been given. He wasn’t there to talk about the glories of modern life. He was there to discuss its effect on the human soul.

Innovation, he suggested, had not just given us more efficiency; it gave us a world that taxed the human brain and its ability to keep up. He described a nonstop stream of “external and internal stimuli” in a loud, fast, overscheduled world. Far ahead of his time, he suggested that people have a limited amount of “mental energy”—­something we now know to be more or less true—­and that a highly stimulating environment consumes far more of it. One side of our psyche, the side built around achievement and work, may be able to keep up, he explained, but our spiritual and emotional side was absolutely spent. Humanity, Simmel was saying, was too sensitive for such a life.

Of particular concern to Simmel was how people coped. Unable to react meaningfully to every new piece of information, overstimulated citizens were apt to become “blasé” or, simply put, apathetic. They learned to suppress their feelings, to treat one another transactionally, to care less. After all, they had to. They heard terrible news from around the world daily, like the eruption of Mount Pelée, which killed twenty-­eight thousand people in minutes, or the horrors of British concentration camps in Africa. Meanwhile, they tripped over homeless people and tuned out strangers packed tightly in the streetcar. How could they possibly extend empathy, or even simple acknowledgment, to everyone they met? Instead, they closed off their hearts out of necessity. Their demanding outer world had devoured their inner world and, with it, their ability to connect.

Simmel warned that by living under such overload, we face “being levelled down and swallowed up.” As you might expect, his words were initially met with scorn. But once published, they became his most-­talked-­about essay. The piece spread quick…