A Jewish Book of Comfort

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Auteur

By Alan A. Kay

Texte du rabat

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Contenu

Introductionxv

Readings
We Bring Our Years to an Endxvii
To Everything There Is a Seasonxvii
One Generation Passeth Awayxvii
The Chain Goes Onxviii
O Lord, You Have Examined Me and Know Mexviii

I. PASSAGES: COMING AND GOING

1. When Death Comes There Are Many Ways to Mourn3

Readings
My God, My God, Why Have You Abandoned Me19
I Cry Aloud to God20
Give Ear, I God, to My Prayer20
The Lord Is My Shepherd21
The Oldest Memory21
The Death of Rabbi Me'ir's Sons22
On Death and Dying23
Conversation with the Angel of Death26

II. AVELUT: THE FIVE STAGES OF JEWISH MOURNING

2. Aninut: From Death to Burial39

Death (Mavet)40

Readings
Oh, My Suffering49
I Am Racked With Grief49
Deliver Me, O God49
I Am Weary50
There Is but One Step50
On My Part, I Will Not Speak with Restraint50
Refuge50
The Spirit of Man Is the Lamp of the Lord51
Maariv51

Burial (Kavorah)55

Readings
My Heart77
Do Not Comfort Thy Fellow77
Death as Estrangement77
But Who Is Now My Comforter78
Hear My Cry, O God78
A Palace in Flames79
On Weeping for the Dead79
Mourning79
Kaddish80
My Grandmother80
Grandfather Dies81
Explaining Death to Children82
A Funeral83
Strange Envy84
The Passing of Tzirel Dvorah Siegel85
God Works Miracles87
Death87
Protect Me, O God, for I Seek Refuge in You87
Out of the Depths I Call You, O Lord88
The Face of God89
God, You Are My God89
After My Death90
Who Has Lived?91
I Know I Won't Come This Way Again91
Part of Life92
Hold On and Let Go92
There Is Nothing New Beneath the Sun93
Grief94
A Parable95
Burial Kaddish96
Evening Service97

3. Shivah: The First Three Days after Burial99

Readings
Pierced within Me111
A Season for Everything111
Silence111
The Death of Abraham112
Surviving the Loss of a Spouse112
My Eyes Are Spent with Tears112
I Know Not Your Ways112
Life Cycle113
On Returning Home after a Funeral113
Mirrors114
Moed Katan114
Ben115
Summation of Faith117
Kaddish117
Henrietta Szold's Letter to Haym Peretz117
The Rebbe's Visit118
Consolation of Grief121
Ruth's Story123
Mourner's Kaddish117
I Am Weary with Groaning126

4. Shivah: The Concluding Days of the Week127

Readings
Do Not Abandon Me, O Lord139
Job's Story139
Losses143
How Long Have We Forgotten How to Listen144
Passover145
Light a Candle145
Sorrow Can Enlarge the Domain of Our Life146
The Fraternity of Mourners146
We Do Not Stand Alone149
Finally Answering the Call150
Today Again My Complaint Is Bitter153
Heal Me, O Lord, and Let Me Be Healed154
Where Does It End?154
Beyond Judgment155
The Existence of God156
It Is Never Too Late157
The Kaddish158
Thoughts on the Kaddish159
Rabbi Akiva's Compassion159
Job and the Lord161

5. Shloshim: The First Thirty Days after Burial169

Readings
Our Days Upon the Earth175
Ecclesiastes Rabbah175
Comfort Ye, Comfort Ye176
He Will Cover Thee with His Pinions176
He Will Give His Angels Charge over Thee176
Man in Time176
A Terrible Inner Numbness177
Kaddish178
The Conquest of Grief178
You're Leaving Me179
The Rose Is Queen180
God Kisses Moses' Soul181
The Mourning for Moses183
Healthy Grief184
Between184
Religious Rituals186
The Meaning of the Kiddish186
A Day with My Mother and Aunt Phyllis, Her Sister189
A Death in the Family193

6. Yahrzeit: The Yearly Anniversary of the Death
   (Mourning for a Parent) 195

Readings
The God of Springing Grass203
Personal Credo203
As Much as Man Can Comfort204
Death and Fear of Death205
Lord Make Me to Know Mine End207
The Death of Adam207
The Death of Eve209
Thy Sun Shall No More Go Down209
Preparing Aaron for Impending Death210
Aaron's Death212
The Days of Our Years Are Three Score Years214
A Herald of Death215
Abraham Views Earth and Heaven217
Into Thine Hand I Commit My Spirit219
The Death and Burial of Sarah220
The Lord Shall Keep Thee from All Evil223
The Death of Jacob223
A Good Man Leaveth an Inheritance228
Rav Sheshet and the Angel228
Blessed Is the Lord229
First You Mourn229
Consolation229
Ten Hard Things230
The Righteous231
The Shortfalls of Knowledge231
To Hold with Open Arms232
My Father's Memorial Day237
Mothers238
The Minyan Is a Community238
Kaddish is for My Father241
Kaddish in Many Places242
European Delicacy246
A Star Fell246

III. YIZKOR: PRAYER IN MEMORY FOR THE DEAD

7. The Pain and Redemption of Remembrance249

Readings
Thou Shalt Be Missed255
A New Dress255
I Am Sad, God256
Joseph257
A Tree Is Best Measured … 257
My Father260
Preludes to Kaddish261
The Death of My Father262
Meditations on Visits to the Cemetery266
Meditations and Prayers at the Grave267
God, You Are My God268
O Lord, You Have Been Our Refuge in Every Generation269
I Turn My Eyes to the Mountains270
Protect Me, O God, for I Seek Refuge in You271
The Lord is My Shepherd272
Yiskor272
O Lord, My God273

IV. PASSAGES: GOING AND COMING

8. When Death Comes There Are Many Ways to Heal 277

Readings
The General Mourning for Aaron289
Samael's Vain Search291
Outrage and Faith293
Is There Life After Death?294
Ani Maamin295
Yigdal296
Yigdal (A Metrical Version)297
Adon Olam298
The Lord of All299
Be Honest and Upright to Your Self and Fellow Man300
Life Has Been Inexpressibly Sweet to Me301
I Know I Cannot Impose My Values and Judgments
on You303

Afterword305

Glossary307

References315

Acknowledgements321

Index327